Dear Sam,

Sender: Ben [torturedosfan9384838348484@yahogglemail.com]

Receiptant: Sam Perlozzo [buntsnbynum@hotgahogglelink.net]

Dearest Sam,

I think I didn’t notice, but I saw the game last night. I can’t say that I was too wild with Nick Markakis bunting in the tenth with Brian on first. Nick, if you weren’t watching, was 3 for 4 and has picked it back up at the plate. Sorry bud, but I don’t see any logic in that move. It’s time that you acknowledge that you have a problem. There’s help for people you have problems like yours. Here’s the link [buntaholics.net].

Some tips:

*Acknowledge your problem

*surround yourself with people who can help

*listen to others

*use the bunt only when neccessary

*acknowledge that the bunt is not the only means to get on base.

*allow batters to swing

I know a lot of folks have been hard on you as of late (myself include) and maybe that drove you to a bunt relapse. Sorry if it did, but you can’t argue with the truth. Props on finally leaving the dugout and talking to the umps, now you need to work on arguing with them. Don’t ask them what happen, cuss ’em and kick some dirt. You look like you’re talking about the weather or the newest articles in Cosmo. Some show fire man! Your necks on the line.

Regards,

Ben

P.S.- I’m starting to suspect Danys Baez might stink. Please give me news to the contrary.

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